This time of the year; probably more than ever before; we reflect or reminisce about the past 12 months! What we are unable to recall, the media will use their year’s end broadcasts to recall and remember. Others have already begun to express their New Year’s Resolutions; identifying areas in which they could have improved or things they had wish they had done better.
Is it the same for you?
Maybe you’re thinking about some of your relationships; especially if they ended differently than you anticipated or in the way you desired. Was there something you wished you had spoken to someone; and missed the window of opportunity to say it? Or maybe you are experiencing feelings of regret over things you wish would have ended differently, better or more. Are you hearing yourself say?:
· I wish I had told him that I loved him.
· I missed my opportunity to let her know how proud I was when she graduated from middle school.
· I never thanked her for always making my favorite meal on my birthday.
· I wish she would have started cancer treatment sooner.
· If I could, I would have gotten her to the family reunion one more time.
· I wish I could take back what I said.
· We should have taken that vacation we always dreamed about.
· I wish I was more present when we were together.
Reflecting is an essential part of our learning, growth; but very different from ruminating
The problem with regret is that it keeps you out of the moment and it robs you of joy.
Regretting things, you wish you had said or done can stay with you for a long time, and limit your capacity for happiness. Sadly, it can impact your current and future relationships as well. Dealing with those regrets of the past require re-orienting your attention and filling your thoughts to things that are good, pleasant, and joyful.
So how can you move away from playing those “would’ve, could’ve should’ve scenarios inside of your head? This happens after you have spoken the undelivered communication. This is where I can co-journey with you.
As an Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist certified by The Grief Recovery Institute, I will walk with you in determining which relationship in your life is filled with the most unfinished business and then, point by point, address those regrets in such a way that they no longer continue to displace any JOY that relationship brought to your life! Taking this action will give you the opportunity to enjoy your fond memories without being continually overwhelmed by regrets of omission, and even the regrets of commission!
In 2021, Let’s do something Amazing - Without Any Regrets! Someone's Depending on You!
From My Heart to Yours!
Dr. Jacqui